Slower speeds limits needed in Tulsa?

[cannon_fodder]

First, speed humps are sent from the devil.  ZOOM, screeech, ZOOOM, thump, screeech, zooooom.  Very rarely do they actually slow the street down, they merely slow it down every now and then and encourage rapid acceleration every where else.  I hate them with the entirety of my being.  

But while we are talking about idiot drivers...

Top 10 complaints about Tulsa drivers:

1) MERGER.  When getting on a highway you are supposed to accelerate and merge into traffic.  Stopping is not merging.  In fact, when you are attempting to get on a highway stopping at the top of the on ramp makes it much, much more difficult for you (and everyone else) to actually accomplish their goal.

I hate you Mr. stop at the top of the onramp man.

2) DRIVING IN THE RIGHT LANE ON THE FREEWAY.  There are 3 separate lanes on many or most of Tulsa's freeways.  The left most is for passing, the middle is for driving, and the right most lane is generally for merging and exiting traffic.  I understand that there are instances when this system breaks down under volume, but we are in Tulsa; not LA.  Thus, under most circumstances this should be the status quo.

A contributing factor to #1 probably

3) NO LEFT TURN.  The little signs with a left arrow and an ex, or the words "NO LEFT TURN" sometimes accompanied by the previously mentioned symbol... actually mean no left turn. I understand this sucks, BUT, if and when there is a line of care behind you (most likely getting angry and honking and otherwise encouraging you to go straight) you should probably obey this sign.  You're being a jerk.  When there are no cars to impede, ignore it... I don't care.  But don't be a jerk.

This a applies double at my boys school.  Turn right jerks and go around the block.  There is not room to turn left, that's why you all sit like retarded sheep wondering why it takes so long to drop off your crotch fruit at school.

4) MERGE LANES.  Kind of related to #1, but more rare.  Sometimes, just sometimes, there is a special lane allowing you to merge.  This is true of several onramps to 169 where you get your own temporary lane, of the 169 to 71st exit ramp, and exiting from the BA to Harvard southbound.  When you have your own little lane, you can briefly yield to make sure there are no (other) idiots and then keep going.   You DO NOT, NOT need to stop and then proceed into traffic abandoning your merge lane.  

They gave you a little slice of heaven and you refuse to use it.

5) FOUR WAY STOPS.  At a four way stop the vehicle there first has the right of way.  If multiple vehicles are there at the same time yield to the right.  When it is time to go cars in opposite directions go at the same time (gasp!).  Right turners can go at the same time as well.  Any left turners should proceed INTO the intersection as if going straight until the straight traffic has cleared, at which point they turn.  When clear the traffic in the 90 degree direction (left/right) doe the same. Repeat.

You are all idiots.  Stop waiving me on, waiving him on, zipping a quick left in front of me, or doing the you go I go you go he goes OK we'll all go at once crap. Follow the damn rules.

6) RIGHT ON RED. You can turn right on red. Really, you can.  Go ahead.  You can also turn left on a red light IF turning from a one way streets to another one way street.  Seriously, this shouldn't be news to you.

7)  LEFT TURNS.  For the sake of the gods people.  When turning left though shalt proceed INTO THE INTERSECTION before executing your turn.  You DO NOT have to wait behind the white line for traffic to clear enough for you to then proceed into the intersection and execute a turn.  NO.  Just go into the intersection, and stop IN the intersection.  Thus you need much less time to execute your turn when traffic allows AND should the light turn yellow/red you will be able to execute your turn and allow greater traffic flow.

Really people, I'm not making this up... this is how they teach it to be done.

But that said, the left turn yields to the straight every time.  You can't sneak a quick left turn in front of me as soon as the light turns green. Your Honda is not that fast no matter how big your muffler is and I will crush you with my SUV.

Stop signs and red lights are NOT optional.  I get that you will not totally stop your wheels at a stop sign unless needed, and I'm OK with that.  BUT, you need to at least slow down to such an extent that you are barely moving... that you could stop with *very* little effort should the need arise.

Speed limits can be fudged, fine.  Rolling stops at stop signs, OK.  But seriously people, stop lights are fairly serious business.  

9) NO TALKING.  I don't mean don't talk to passengers.  I don't mean no cell phones even.  I mean don't stop in the middle of the damn road and roll down your window to have a conversation.  

You're not cool, you're an donkey.  And I hate you.

10) YOU ARE NOT COOL.  Odds are, you're car is not cool.  I am not impressed but what you have done to destroy a perfectly good hatch back.  I've seen Corvettes before.  I've heard loud motorcycles.   You're stereo is loud and you listen to gansta rap, good for you.  Any pickup truck should be able to burn the back tires.  I don't care how low in your seat you can sit.  Stickers in windows are not impressive.

I know it seems cool to be on a crotch rocket, or in a sports car, or in a big truck.  Really, I get it.  It does seem cool.  But really, it's probably not.  To everyone else it's just another vehicle.  There are very few vehicles that by their essence make you cool, your is probably not one of them.

/rant