Need some advice on Adoption

[Steve]

quote:Originally posted by sgrizzle

I understand they still have to have a court order to open the records and sign agreements from both parties, but they obviously don't need an intermediary to setup a meeting like you were suggesting.

We are kind of getting carried away here, but the original message posted by sunny stated that she and her birth daughter have already met.  That is a given.  My point is that she has little hope of getting a court to open the adoption records and giving her access to her daughter's original birth certificate so she can have the girl enrolled on Indian tribal roles.  This is not a reason that Oklahoma courts will deem valid to open sealed adoption records.  It usually must be a life or death type of situation.  As insane as it all may seem, regardless if the birth parents and adult child know each other, in a closed adoption in Oklahoma, the records always remain closed for any but the most dire reason.  The birth mother and child may both consent to have the records opened, but the courts will not allow it.

[SoonerAttorney]

This thread got away from Sunny's original request, but I think it was answered correctly.  They must get a court order.

I have been reading posts for awhile but registered due to this thread.  We adopted our 6-year-old after being her foster parents.  I think the rationale behind the "joint consent" rule is that sometimes adoptive parents want privacy on this issue.  Believe me, I understand from personal experience that a child wants to know where they come from.  However, to encourage adoption, rather than other means of terminating parenthood, the State decided that it would give the parent the option to remain anonymous if they chose adoption.  Children essentially have the same right to stay anonymous.  That is why the joint registry was created.  If both sides want to find one another, they can.

I'm not trying to argue it's right or wrong, but just trying to offer the other side of the coin.  The State always tries to balance these rights, and when it does, there are always some people who will lose.

[Steve]

Sunny, does your tribe accept DNA testing results as proof of Indian blood?  One avenue you may ivestigate is DNA testing.  I don't know what tribal rules are for membership and if they accept DNA testing as proof, but a DNA test could prove she is the mother of the child and at least prove the minimum amount of Indian blood the child has.  Say if sunny is 1/4 Indian blood, then a DNA test could prove she is the mother and the child must be at least 1/8 Indian blood, right?  If the results prove the child does not have the minimum blood standard, then the biological father would be needed to show the child's exact percentage of Indian blood.  If the father's participation is not possible, then she may just be out of luck.

If tribal law will accept DNA testing in lieu of the original birth certificate, then it doesn't matter what Oklahoma adoption laws are and the original birth certificate would not be needed.  A DNA test would only cost $200-$300 and prove maternity and the minimum Indian blood of the child.  Just some thoughts.

[sunny]

Thanks for all of your input on this matter.
The DNA will be the best way to go I think.I will have to talk to my tribe also, we are a small tribe of about 2500. THANKYOU!!!!!!!!!

[Steve]

quote:Originally posted by sunny

Thanks for all of your input on this matter.
The DNA will be the best way to go I think.I will have to talk to my tribe also, we are a small tribe of about 2500. THANKYOU!!!!!!!!!

Yes, check to see with your tribe if DNA testing is sufficient proof for tribal membership.  DNA test results are so often used these days in court matters, so you stand a chance of circumventing Oklahoma adoption laws entirely!  If your tribal courts will not accept DNA test results, maybe you will be the catalyst for change in the tribal laws.

I am glad you were able to find your daughter.  I hope it was a happy reunion.  I was an adopted child myself in Oklahoma, 50 years ago, and have been unable so far to contact my birth parents.  I wish you luck with your endeavor.