Hillary to Sally: Drop DEAD

[tulsasignnazi]

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder
THEN again, the same argument was raised with integration to some extent.  Though the argument that a black man was any different than a white man was fictitious, and there could be some merit to the notion of a gay man enjoying his trip to the showers (I would in a female barrack so...).  Argh.

Well, if EVERYONE would just simply get NEKKID, the facination would NOT exist.  You probably just need a REAL date.  The act of banishment bestows power to the object of the banishment.

[cannon_fodder]

Paul, I'm glad many people cover up.  There are plenty of people who I would encourage to get nekkid, but dear lord not everyone.  On the larger stage, I'm glad there is some level of modesty so strip scantily glad women are still fun to watch...

And on a personal note, I haven't had a real date for over a decade.  My wife would be pissed.

[tulsasignnazi]

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder
And on a personal note, I haven't had a real date for over a decade.  My wife would be pissed.

EXACTLY my point.  And, how did I know this little morsel?  []

[cannon_fodder]

It could be that I talk about my wife and my son from time to time.  Or that you have actually been  to my house before and met my wife and I (petition signing, doubt you recall).  Or that your superior sense of perception picked up on other subtle hints.

[RecycleMichael]

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder

Paul, I'm glad many people cover up.  

A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price, the more sheer, the higher the price. Naturally, he opts for the sheerest item pays the $500 and takes it home.

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs, the wife thinks, 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'

So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.

The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'

He never heard the shot.

Funeral on Friday at Noon.

[cannon_fodder]

RM, thanks for the chuckles.  Your random posts do not go unnoticed.

[we vs us]

quote:Originally posted by RecycleMichael

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder

Paul, I'm glad many people cover up.  

A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price, the more sheer, the higher the price. Naturally, he opts for the sheerest item pays the $500 and takes it home.

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs, the wife thinks, 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'

So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.

The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'

He never heard the shot.

Funeral on Friday at Noon.

Is there a place that I can purchase a compendium of these jokes?  I'm in the sales business, after all, and both short- and long-form jokes about negligee are, frankly, like money in the bank.  

Hell, I'd pony up for a list of your punchlines if you had 'em.  Gems like "You'd think for $500 at least they'd iron it!" is comedy gold.  That's my quarterly bonus RIGHT THERE.

[we vs us]

quote:Originally posted by RecycleMichael

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder

Paul, I'm glad many people cover up.  

A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price, the more sheer, the higher the price. Naturally, he opts for the sheerest item pays the $500 and takes it home.

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs, the wife thinks, 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'

So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.

The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'

He never heard the shot.

Funeral on Friday at Noon.

Is there a place that I can purchase a compendium of these jokes?  I'm in the sales business, after all, and both short- and long-form jokes about negligee are, frankly, like money in the bank.  

Hell, I'd pony up for a list of your punchlines if you had 'em.  Gems like "You'd think for $500 at least they'd iron it!" is comedy gold.  That's my quarterly bonus RIGHT THERE.

[jamesrage]

quote:Originally posted by Conan71


She's lying again:

MY thoughts exactly, the same woman whose husband defined marriage as a union between one man and one woman and instituted the don't ask don't tell policy for the military.

[tulsasignnazi]

I don't understand the punchline.  Reading from the long drawn out set-up, would anyone really care if Eliott Spitzer got busted having wild and crazy sex with his wife?

I am not altogether sure Eliott Spitzer having sex with a prostitute makes interesting copy.  But, if he got busted with a shovel in his hand in Central Park burying a dead body six-foot under a newly planted sycamore, that would be somewhat interesting.  Maybe just a notch above the Board of Adjustment variance hearing on the Asian massage parlor planning to locate next to Boston Ave. Methodist.

I think I definitely NEED tree rehab.

[TheArtist]

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder

I have mixed feelings on the "don't ask don't tell" policy.  I have some understanding of the military and how very close one must be at all times to your fellow soldiers.  I could see the problems an openly gay man could have/cause in a unit (think toilets 2' apart facing each other with no stalls, we're talking close living).

Tough situation.  Would a female barracks welcome a man into their shower?  Not analogous of course, but it hints at the problems.  And that's pretending no one in the barracks has a defacto problem with gays.

THEN again, the same argument was raised with integration to some extent.  Though the argument that a black man was any different than a white man was fictitious, and there could be some merit to the notion of a gay man enjoying his trip to the showers (I would in a female barrack so...).  Argh.

I dont know what army barracks you have been in, but the ones I was in had doors on the stalls lol.  When I first enlisted we were reopening a base that had been previously closed. We had to stay in old WWII Army Barracks. But even those had stalls just like everywhere. Same with bootcamp. The new Barracks that were built were nicer than many apartments. And when your gay your quite practiced at not seeing every guy as some sort of "sex object". Most arent neeearely as attractive as they think they are, gay and straight, "ask a woman about that". Then your used to "showering" with other guys from gym in school all your life or just going to the gym as an adult and using the "mens room". Its not a big deal. Think of it like meeting some really hot chick then being told its your long lost sister. Plus it obviously doesn't do any good for a gay guy to be attracted to someone who is not gay as well. What would be the point? Likely to get the crap beat out of ya at best, you just dont ever go there, plain and simple.  

I remember in basic training this one guy in my squad had a problem with blacks. Yes its hard to imagine in this day and age that there are people like that but apparently there are. Plus its not like he couldnt have realized he was going to have to work with them, a good proportion of the people in the army are black. But anyway, he didnt want to work with some of the black guys, yelled and called them names, the drill sargeants, 2 of whome were black, laid into him. Guess who his new "buddy" was? A black guy of course. Your buddy is the one you rely on to make it through things. You either get along really really well, or you both suffer big time. " for instance, KP is the closest thing to living hell that I have run accross lol, though I didnt have to do it because I got in trouble, everyone had at least 1 turn, just so you know lol" I watched as that guy pretty quickly took on a whole different attitude "though not without some good fights". A lifetime of prejudice appeared to be smacked down as he had to unavoidably learn, face to face, that his prejudices were flat wrong and in the end they became good friends.