"DHS reform and PROTEST"

[jonesgrrl]

Hello people of Tulsa, you do not know me, although many of you may. I am a teenager, but a ridiculously mature one. I also spent over 11 years of my life in foster care. DHS, although a great program, did more damage to my family and I than it ever did good. Here is why:

First: "DHS keeps siblings together." They truly do not. Any foster child will probably tell you the same thing. Through out the entire time that I spent in foster care I never lived with both my siblings, and in fact, I was never allowed to live with my younger brother, only my older one. Although DHS will deny it if asked, I have the case files to prove it. This is one thing that DHS did to my family and I will never forgive them for, because it has emotionally damaged us for the rest of our lives.

Second: "The kids are well watched." This is completely false. I suffered more from sexual assault while in the system than I ever did out side of it. In my life I have been molested four times and raped twice. Unfortunately only two of these incidents occurred while I was not in DHS custody. The case workers do not visit the kids like they are suppose to. Case workers are over loaded, and DHS is understaffed, they always are. But this does not excuse the fact that case workers hardly ever call, and usually never visit. I have had case workers i never even spoke to and I have definitely never met. This is what leads to the abuse that happens inside DHS.

Third: "They try to reunite the families." This is also a complete lie. I know for a fact that my father tried everything he could to get my brothers and me out of DHS. Despite all the classes, and all his good behavior; they refused. The parents aren't even allowed to see their kids unsupervised. Don't get me wrong this is a great policy, but they take it way to far. It is sometimes hard for the parents to get a hold of case workers. They can't see their kid with out the case worker present, and the case workers do not return calls, which leads the parents to eventually giving up.

Four: "The kids get to see there sibling." This one is complete b.s. In the entire time I was in the system I hardly ever got to see my brothers. I was lucky if I saw them once a year at Christmas. DHS did not even set up holiday visits. They approved them but my Nana was truly the one in charge. They wouldn't even give her the phone number of the parent we were living with a lot of the time. This is also why my Nana made sure we all memorized her phone number because she knew it would always be hard to track us down, especially after DHS moved us, which they do a lot. Also even when a former foster child ages out, or turns 18, they still are not allowed to see their younger siblings, even if they can pass a drug test and have a stable job.

Five: "The kids stay in the same place." I'm sure some kids do stay in the same place, but the truth is, most of us end up floaters. Which simply means we are emotionally damaged children that certain parents can't handle. Because of this, we end up moving dozens of times, and never establish a true family. This tends to leave us emotionally scarred for life. Also, they will force emotionally damaged kids to live in group homes. Although this does work sometimes, it is a horrible idea. Children need a mom and or dad. Kids need siblings, even if they are not blood. Group homes remove the concept of family all together. When you live in this environment, with no family, just bosses, it destroys you in the end. Especially when your just a misbehaving, but extremely misunderstood child.

I am not trying to destroy the Department of Human Services, I just want to fix it. The reform is coming and I want to help lead it. Other foster children are going to start to speak up too. City of Tulsa, you just wait, its going to happen. I am even going to protest and any one who would like to join this very confused, and slightly emotionally damaged almost 20 year, please contact me at spaztikmonkey@yahoo.com.

This needs to stop and it needs to change now. I've even warned my, now I think former, case worker its coming. Trust me DHS is not going to be surprised, but scared, they know its coming. The case workers realize its wrong, and they know the rules are ridiculous and completely out dated. But I'm being sincere and as a show of good faith my real name is Amy.

The system is completely corrupt, the rules are out dated and the kids are being abused with in this system. The public needs to know what is going on and that is the only way we can truly stop this. City of Tulsa, join me! We can start it here and change the entire nation.

~~~Amy

[RecycleMichael]

Thank you for posting this heartfelt message. You paint a very bleak picture of the system and make a good case for change.

Keep speaking up. Write everywhere and volunteer to help others understand your frustration. Try to get involved from the inside if you can. Only when there are good people on the inside and pressure from the outside do we really ever change anything.

"You must be the change you want to see in the world."

Mahatma Gandhi

[Conan71]

You are well-written, well-spoken, and well-intentioned Amy.

Best wishes on your mission.  It takes real-world experience to let others know the true inner workings of an entity like DHS.

[Red Arrow]

Congratulations on surviving the system.  I cannot even imagine not being allowed to see my brother and sister and cousins while growing up.

[cannon_fodder]

Even a well intentioned bureaucracy will have trouble functioning.  I truly think DHS has a noble mission and the vast majority of the employees and volunteers for DHS do their best.  But it is not perfect; best of luck working to change the system.