PETA wants a robotic groundhog

[Ed W]

Those charming folks at PETA have announced that Punxsutawney Phil should be replaced by an animatronic robot.  Apparently, they object to his treatment, what with being surrounded by a crowd of drunks once a year. 

Actually, if Phil were a genuinely wild groundhog, those people attempting to handle him would quickly discover the strength, speed, razor-sharp claws, and long incisors that groundhogs are issued as standard equipment.  Phil has a comfy deal.  He gets an airconditioned pen in downtown Punxy.  His meals are brought to him.  He doesn't worry about predators.  In short, Phil is treated as a pet.  He has a good gig.  Oh, there's Philomena (if I recall right) so he doesn't lack for female companionship either. 

Punxy is one of those small towns where the calendar consists of trout season, spring turkey season, garden veggie season, bass season, dove season, small game season, archery season, and deer season.  In Pennsylvania, most schools and businesses close for the first day of deer season.  So Punxy loves Phil and takes good care of him.  He brings tourists and their money to town.  Who's the mayor?  Who knows - but the whole country knows Punxsutawney Phil.

http://thephoenix.com/BLOGS/laserorgy/archive/2010/02/01/robohog-tktk.aspx

[Red Arrow]

PETA:
People Eating Tasty Animals

Oops! wrong group

[Conan71]

Meat is murder.

Tasty, tasty murder.

If God hadn't intended for people to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat.